The legacy we live with...

So what about our lives now? What in our every day lives are things we do just because our parents did them? Or what do we not do because it just wasn't done that way?

Each of us has had very different upbringings. And that's not a bad thing. After all, if we were all the same life would get very boring very quickly!

When I look at my boys and the legacy they are coming into, I need to look at both our families. My mum was brought up to be a strong woman. Her father passed away when she was only 10 and as the only girl with 3 brothers, she had to do a lot. Then after she had me and my sister, she was on her own with us, and again had to be stronger than she should have had to be. Finally, after my wee sister was born, she had to extra strong as she fought to get her the help and care she needed, after the doctors told us she would never walk or talk. 

So I come from a legacy left by a very strong woman. Maybe even too strong. She doesn't get help offered when she actually needs it because she has been so strong in the past. I am in awe of her constantly. 

On the other side, my husband's family is very male dominated. He is from a footballing family - a family where his uncle and his dad were involved in football at a high level. Then there were six of them - all boys - and all of them have been footballers at some point and to a good level. So there's a lot of maleness in the family! 

So it's a real mix of fun in our house! 

There are things in our family that we have had to have discussions about - like the fact that one family eats Christmas dinner at 1pm, while the other usually has it around 3pm. Not a big problem, I hear you say, but then try to fit going to both houses on Christmas Day, and we ended up eating two Christmas lunches! 

This is one specific example, but there are millions of these little decisions every single day. Our job is to navigate and compromise these to make our family legacy different, and a mixture of both. 

But sometimes the legacy you receive from your parents isn't as easy to live with. If you had a parent who grew up in a broken home, or with abusive parents, they can easily fall into that trap again and do the same to you. You then have the decision to follow in their footsteps or change the story. 

Or maybe you had a parent who was addicted to alcohol or drugs, or who was depressed or struggled with anger, you have to decide to stop the cycle and turn the legacy around. It may be hard, especially if your family struggles with addiction, but it will be worth it. You get to decide on a brand new legacy for the next generation. 



There is someone who can help - no matter what your past or legacy - Christ comes in and changes everything. He gives us the strength to put the old things away and build new practices and new life. Tomorrow we will talk about leaving the best legacy for the next generation.
Tanya ♥



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